As an adult I can look back and see not just the emotional harm, but the physical damage as well, not to mention the spiritual harm. My molester is now dead, so any recourse or apology from him is gone, but my aim now is to never, ever allow this to happen to another child. Here in North Alabama, I will spread the word about your Foundation, and as I can, I hope to start donating to your site. I think one important thing I finally realized is that I did nothing wrong. I believe most abused children think that somehow it was their fault. Almost like we wear a neon sign on our head that says, "pick me, I will be your victim". Now I know that child abusers have a sixth sense about who would be a good "target". I will never understand the kind of sick brain that would do evil to children. I hope you won't mind if I stay in touch with you. I have gone through doctors, counselors, the works, but unless one has experienced the horror and shame we feel, they have no idea. I find myself going through the stages of grief from time to time--anger, hurt, rage, sorrow, etc. I push to heal. I try to forgive, but that is hard to do. I remind myself to stay busy, help others, and not let the anger/hurt/rage overcome me. I did take the opportunity to confront my molester at my workplace. I took a witness with me, afterwards I felt as if I lost 400 pounds. Of course, I got in trouble for it, but then again, I didn't care. As ugly as it sounds I thought they could all go to hell because I certainly had lived in hell. I do not wish this on my worst enemy. Please keep marching forward and get the message out that sadly we are not alone, and it certainly wasn't our fault.
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